This is a perfect example of what I do instead of what I should be doing.
I'm a world class procrastinator. This blog only exists because of my procrastination.
This particular post is also further evidence of how badly I need an artistic outlet... one that will satisfy me more then the odd iMovie project or solo late-night dance party.
I will admit that I've been avoiding important matters, like studying for my differed exams, writing my differed essays or creating a flexible itinerary for my 6 weeks of backpacking throughout East Africa. I have been getting other things done slowly but surely. A lot of important miscellaneous paperwork, fundraising... and progressing through difficult matters that cannot be specifically defined, like grief, PTSD,... mental growth which I am still trying to put more outward emphasis on.
I have ONE MONTH until I leave for Tanzania! Unfortunately for me, (with my procrastinating ways / productivity interfering PTSD ) my To-Do list in the next month would make an excellent plot for Mission Impossible 4. Fuck.
I am capable.
I am motivated.
I have a large and long-awaited award at the end.
I must make those my affirmations... to encourage myself.
It's officially Christmas Eve Eve. December 23rd. I am nearly done my Christmas shopping. Frankly, I am spending money I don't have, but I can't help it.
Although I know my family and friends are not superficial, and don't measure how much I appreciate them with how much I spend on them, I have still chosen to take on the impossible task of trying to find something material that can accurately symbolize just how much that is... on a budget. Uhhh. I've found some nice things that I hope they will enjoy.
Anyhow, I will keep this short for I am trying to get my sleep schedule back on track.
I will try to post back in a few days. It will include my fundraising video!